Do you yell at your kids?

Our question this week: 

"I yell at my kids way more than I'd like to admit and I feel awful about it. I try to apologize after, but I’m just stuck in this cycle of yelling and saying sorry. I don't want to scare my kids and I'm worried that my apologies aren't enough to make up for all of the hurt I've caused. What can I do to truly fix things?"

Our actionable tip: 

✅ REPAIR  

We’ve gotten this question so many times over the past year, and we get it. 

Too often we’ve found ourselves in that cycle of yelling and saying sorry, but the one thing that’s made such a huge difference is we've gotten better at REPAIR.

It’s not just about apologizing, but instead, taking actionable steps to heal the damage, strengthen the relationship, and prevent trauma.

So for example…

Imagine you've just yelled at your kids and the guilt begins to set in almost immediately. You know you need to apologize, and you do say sorry, but deep down, things still feel icky.

Maybe you’re scared that your apologies aren't enough to repair the damage you've caused.

Now imagine this…

You’ve yelled, but this time, you start to put into practice our 3-step repair process.

Just remember… AAA.

1) Acknowledge
2) Apologize
3) Analyze

We must fully acknowledge what we’ve done and think deeply about the potential long-term impacts.

Recognizing and taking full responsibility for the pain and hurt we’ve caused will always be the first step in the healing process. What we say and do can have substantial consequences for our kids’ well-being, so let's own it.

Only then can we deliver a sincere apology, which should never be just a quick "I'm sorry". 

A good apology is an open expression of regret that shows them that you truly recognize and understand what you’ve done. It should show that you’re committed to being better, not just with words, but through specific actions.

And the repair doesn't stop here. Now it’s time for the third step… analyze.

You need to look back at what happened to uncover any identifiable triggers and then develop a repair action plan so these kinds of mistakes happen less and less over time.

By going through this 3-step repair process, we’re not just fixing what's broken, but instead, we’re building a stronger, healthier relationship built on trust, love, and understanding.

Let's release the guilt, forgive ourselves, and do what we need to do to grow more into the kind, calm, and patient parents that we want to be.

So go get your toolbox. It’s time to REPAIR. 🛠

From our parenting toolkit:

The timing of this question couldn't have been any more perfect.  

We recently launched our new 3 Steps to Repair Workshop where we go step-by-step, walking you through our 3-step repair process using our personal stories as examples.

The workshop is over 140 minutes of educational content, and the most important part, it's full of application-based activities that'll help you put into practice what you learn.

So if you’re tired of the yelling and are ready to:

✅ Repair the damage
✅ Prevent future mistakes
✅ Break generational cycles
✅ Strengthen your relationships
✅ Stop trauma in its tracks

Join us in our 3 Steps to Repair workshop!

You can learn more about the workshop here, but if you're ready to dig in with us...

You can click here to access the full workshop, our other workshops, and more FREE for 7 days.

 Here’s some feedback that we’ve gotten about our workshops: 

“I’ve taken several online workshops before but none compare to yours! The content was unparalleled and the organization and flow of the modules (along with the printables) were cherries on top. Thank you so much for putting these workshops together!”

 
You don’t have to do this alone. Click here to join us in The Collective free for 7 days and come see if our workshops and other support activities are a good fit for you at no cost. 

We look forward to seeing you in there! 🙂

Happy Human Resources:

• Get Module 1 of our "3 Steps to Repair" workshop FREE
• Get Module 1 of our "Regulated Parenting" workshop FREE
• Get Module 1 of our "Release the Stress" workshop FREE
• Access all of our workshops and community resources FREE for 7 days  
• Submit your burning questions here

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