Get Your Kids to Listen Without Yelling

Hello, Happy Human! 👋

We're here with our weekly 3 things...

1️⃣ A question from our community

2️⃣ Our actionable tips

3️⃣ A resource from our toolkit

1. The question

“My son was jumping on his sister and didn’t stop when she told him to. I came in yelling and pulled him off of her, but how can I get him to listen without needing to yell and grab?”

2. Our answer

✅ Control Yourself First

We know. When you see one of your kids physically tormenting the other, staying calm feels impossible.

But here’s the thing…

Kids learn regulation through observation, so if we yell and grab, they’ll just learn to yell and grab too.

But if we can stay calm, set a boundary, and model compassion, then they’ll learn to do the same.

So the next time something like this happens:

⭐️ Step 1. Pause & Take a Breath 

• Your reaction sets the tone for what happens next. 
• Instead of charging in like a referee breaking up a fight, take one deep breath before stepping in.

⭐️ Step 2. Protect the One Being Hurt

• Instead of focusing on the child doing the harm, give your immediate attention to the one being hurt.
• Pick them up and check in: "Are you okay? I’m sorry they didn’t listen when you said stop.”

⭐️ Step 3. Let the Other Child Observe

• When kids see compassion and care in action, they absorb it. 
• Much of the time, the child who was rough will come forward on their own to apologize and show care too (because you showed them what it looks like).

⭐️  Step 4. Talk About It (Once Everyone’s Calm)

• When emotions have settled, have a conversation: “When someone says stop, we listen. If you want to roughhouse, we need to make sure both people are having fun.” 
• This keeps it a teachable moment rather than a battle.

We have to remember…

The more we co-regulate, the more they learn to self-regulate. And over time, they won’t need us to step in as much because they’ll have the skills to do it themselves.

Like all things, don’t ever expect yourself to be perfect, but the more you practice these steps, the more your kids will learn to mirror your calm instead of the chaos.

3. From our toolkit

Look, we know that staying calm when your kid is acting like an unhinged tornado is HARD.

In fact, it’s been our greatest challenge as parents of four young kids over the past 13 years.

That’s why we created our Regulated Parenting Workshop.

And for THIS WEEK ONLY, you can grab it for 50% off ($42 SAVINGS)!

✅ You’ll Stop Losing Your Cool (Even When Your Kids Are Pushing Every Button)

• No more snapping, yelling, or feeling like you’re constantly on edge. You’ll learn practical tools to stay calm, even in the most frustrating moments.

✅ You’ll Understand Your Own Triggers (So They Stop Running the Show)

• Why do certain things set you off? This workshop helps you recognize and rewire those triggers so you’re not reacting on autopilot.

✅ Your Home Will Feel More Peaceful & Less Like a Battleground

• Less yelling, fewer power struggles, and more connection. When you regulate yourself first, the energy of your whole home shifts.

Again, it’s never about being perfect, but you CAN become more regulated.

Come grab our Regulated Parenting Workshop for 50% off before the sale ends!

👉 Save $42 on Regulated Parenting here!

Parenting is messy, loud, and SO incredibly triggering sometimes.

But when we focus on controlling ourselves first, our kids will learn to do the same.

As always, thanks for being here. 🙂 

❤️ Jenilee & Greg